If I was there
by PenelopePotter28
Summary: What would happen if I was there for certain episodes? What would I do? What would I change?
1. DOGHOUSE

Abby sneered at her weredog enemy. "Oh thank goodness you're here Mrs. Thompson! Abby was threatening me with violence!"

The teacher scolded Abby and led her away. I protested, but she ignored me.

"Serves her right," the sour blonde said, leaning up against her locker.

"Bottle-blonde," I lashed out at her.

"Idiot," she shot back.

"Priss."

"Dork-lover"

"Snig!"

"Mocha-brain!"

"Two-faced toad!"

"Half-wit!"

"Quarter-wit!"

"Huh?" she asked, confused.

"HA!" I laughed in her face. Then I turned on my heel, leaving her defeated.


	2. SLUMBER

I had hopped on the ship when Fanny invited us on an all-night mission, even though my soul sister had turned it down.

"Alright girls," she said in her normal serious tone. "Our mission is to have-" she lowered a little. "a….slumber party."

She explained how her mom was making her have a slumber party.

"Well why didn't you invite any of your other friends?" Kuki asked innocently. Fanny's face fell. I winced at the accidiss. "Oh," she said, realizing what she had just said.

"Don't worry, I'll be your friend," Numbah 12 said, putting a hand on her shoulder reassuringly.

"Me too," I said, taking the other side. Fanny looked to me with hope in her eyes. There was a certain gleam in Numbah 12's eyes. It was the same gleam I often saw in Cree's. Something was up.

All through the hours of makeovers, bed bouncing, and rainbow monkey marathons, I waited patiently. We were all laughing and talking like a bunch of BFFs. Fanny left the room for a moment.

"Hey, let's play truth or dare."

I looked up at the young girl. Kuki picked truth.

"Ok. Do you like Numbah 4?"

Numbah "four thirty teen twelve" spewed "her" drink all over the place. (I knew it was him. I was just waiting for him to slip up.)

"Of course I like Numbah 4! We're in the same unit!"

"No," her friend countered. "We mean like like.""You mean like like like like like?"

They nodded eagerly. I chuckled.

"Well…um…I….um…I guess I-"

"AIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!"

"That was Fanny!" I said, shooting up from my spot. "We better get out there!"

We ran down the hall towards the kitchen. Fanny was backed up against the wall, with Chad facing her, his back to us. He was wearing a bra over his clothes. He turned around.

"Chad?" Kuki asked.

"Surprised to see me?" he said confidently.

"Surprised to see you wearing a bra!" Kuki shot at him.

Before he could say or do anything, I was on top of him.

"Look, I'm gonna lay it down straight. You're ridiculous, you look stupid, you're an idiot, you're wearing a BRA, and your hair looks like someone ate a banana and dropped the peel on your sad little head. So you better back off our slumber party, k?"

He backed out from under me and stood up. "You don't scare me. Not as long as I've got a hostage!" The next thing any of us knew, he had whipped out a Rainbow Monkey with a sleep mask, pajamas, and a pink pillow.

"My Perfect Pajama Party Rainbow Monkey!" Fanny squealed. Noone made a move. That is, not until I did. I took a single step forward.

"What are you doing?" Fanny hissed. I kept going. With every step I took, Chad moved the stuffed animal sideways a little. I realised he was reaching for the blender. I stopped in my tracks, and for a moment everything was silent. Thoughts whirred and raced through my head. I slowly lifted my arm. He slowly lifted the doll.

And the world can be pretty strange when it comes right down to it.

I couldn't really describe what happened next. All I knew was one moment Chad was about to make a Rainbow Monkey smoothie, and the next moment he was on the floor with a welt on his face, me on top of him and the rainbow monkey safe in Fanny's arms.

"Oh, oh!" she cried.

"Don't hold your breath," I told her. "He was keeping us here for a reason. We better get to moon base. Fast."

We rocketed up to moon base faster than you could say Perfect Pajama Party. Fanny activated the code (after a little screaming) and went into the room. There we faced a small army of what looked like clones. Soon, however, the "Fanny-clone" split apart to reveal Cree. The others turned into various Teen Ninjas.

Numbah 12 was, after all, a traitor. She had handed the code module to Cree after a vicious battle and she was about to blast off with it when I grabbed her by the ankle.

"You," she snarled. I knew she disliked me. I was her sister's soul sister. I had helped her defeat her loads of times. And Cree didn't like that one bit.

I had a vicious fight with Cree, more vicious than ever before. She flung the code module aside in the battle, but no one notised that. Eventually she rolled me off of her and blasted off, taking the others, including Numbah 12, with her into the night.

I stood up and dusted myself off. I picked up the code module and showed everyone that she only THOUGHT she got it. Fanny was staring at the hole.

"She was the closest thing to a friend I ever had.""Don't worry," Kuki said, hugging her. "We're your friends!"

The others around her recoiled. I sighed and put my hand on her shoulder. "Well, us two anyway."

She smiled up at me.


	3. BEACH

I listened to the screams.

"NO! NO! NOOOOOOO!"

The bald Brit was dumped on the beach. Abby and Hoagie came out after him.

"I'm serious guys!" he said, getting up. "The beach is so boring!"

"How can you say that Numbah one?" a voice with a familiar Australian accent said. I turned from where I had been picking up random seashells and beach glass. "Look how much fun I'm having!" the blonde said.

"You're buried up to your neck in sand."

"Thank you, captain obvious," I said, before turning to pick up a particularly nice green piece.

"I know! It rocks!"

"Howabout you help me with my sandcastle Numbah one?""Some other time, perhaps." Yea. Like there was actually going to BE a "some other time".

"Well how bout you Numbah Four? Wanna be my Prince Charming?"

"Yes," I muttered to Abby, and we chuckled because we knew that's how he WANTED to respond. But instead he told her he'd rather be buried in the sand.

As soon as Numbah 1 took off, I didn't really think about much else. We started splashing around in the water, having the time of our lives. There was a nearby dock that I started jumping off of in such ridiculous poses they nearly fell underwater from laughing. But soon I heard screaming. I turned towards the sound. Kuki was being hauled off by….knights? Um, hello, I know I haven't read a fairy tale in awhile, but aren't knights supposed to HELP maidens? This just didn't make sense. I ignored my soul sister's cries to come back, we just got started, and ran after her.

I came to a stop when I saw the giant sandcastle. Woah. Whenever me and Ryann ever tried to build a sandcastle, it ended up looking more like some weird sand monster buried in the beach. But this thing was huge. It must have been like fifty stories! I backed myself up against a wall and silently poked a hole in it. A little sand fell off the side. It may be huge, but it wasn't too strong.

I listened at the wall just in time to hear Kuki giggle, then say "Huh?" in confusion.

"Wanna get married?" I heard a boy's voice say. She giggled, then said something I couldn't make out. It sounded like they left the room.

I dug a hole in the sand, thinking up a plan as I went. I was soon inside the room, being able to tunnel through. If I could just get up to her before she reached the tower, I could at least talk to her.

"Hey you stupid knights in stupid stupid armor!" I heard the all-too-familiar voice shout outside the castle. "Gimme back my friend or else!"

Oh no. He would probably ruin everything.

A moment later, I heard a thump, then a crash. Then Abby and Hoagie walked in through the front door.

"Hey guys," I said, surprising them. But they didn't have time to react because there were soon two knights upon us. I grabbed a sword and helped to fight them. There were two of them and three of us, so they were pretty easily subdued. We heard a crash outside. Wally had fallen off the tower. "He's fine," I said, stopping Abby before she could go to him. "It's sand, not lava rocks. Besides, if we go out there, we get captured too. The best we can hope for is a rescue." She nodded, and we slinked up the stairs.

"WHERE ARE THEY?" I heard the voice that had proposed to Kuki shout out. I poked another hole in a wall. I looked through this time. There was a boy with a bucket on his head and a towel tied around his neck like a cape. He was shouting at one of the knights, the one we hadn't brought down. "I WILL NOT BE SATISFIED UNTIL THE PEASANTS HAVE BEEN CAPTURED!"

"Shh," I told the others, and we crept past the door. I peeked into another room. Kuki was putting a veil on her head. Before we could get in I was thrown to one side and pinned against the wall. I saw the same had happened to my friends. One of the knights had me by the throat with his wooden sword. The boy I had seen earlier strolled past us.

"Ah, poor, mistaken peasants. Did you really think you could stop me?" He looked at us. "Hey! Where's the other one?"

He turned to a knight. "YOU SAID THERE WERE FOUR OF THEM!"

"Hey!" called the familiar voice from above. I looked up and there he was in a window. "Who wants to get the sand kicked outta their shorts?"It was a pretty, well, weird battle. The knights charged with their umbrellas, leaving us fastened to the wall. Wally charged with his. Just as they were about to start "sword fighting", Wally opened his umbrella and the knights bounced off of it and out a window. Just then Kuki came out of her "new room".

"Kuki!"

"Hi Wally!"

"Come on, we gotta go!"

"But I want to pretend to marry King Sandy!"

King Sandy stamped his foot. "PRETEND? THE KING NEVER PRETENDS!"

"What?" Kuki cried, but in the next instant they were both pinned by King Sandy's sword.

I took out my pouch of beach glass, gave it a pat, pulled the string and tossed it near the pretend king's feet. The shells and beach glass spilled out. As soon as he moved, the sharp treasures poked his foot."Ow!" he cried, and started jumping around, only to step on more of them. "Owowowow!"

Soon his jumping caused the floor to cave in. The entire castle shook as he fell.

"We've got to move now!" Wally said, taking Kuki's had and pulling her away, completely forgetting about the rest of us. I sighed and pulled us free. We made a run for it just as the castle crumbled.


	4. DADDY

"_**And if you wake up my older sister, oh ho, forget about it. She's worse than him!"**_

_**I had been listening outside the door for quite some time now. Nigel, Sonya, Lee, and Patty had been talking about the hair-cutting fate that awaited Shawnee.**_

"_**We've never run into an adult or older sister that we can't handle!" Nigel said. After a bit of mumbling, the three other operatives presented themselves. Nigel told Patty he better stay here.**_

"_**I'll go too," I said, sliding through the door. The looked up at me in surprise, wondering what the heck I was doing up here. Truthfully, I had been called up because I know everything there is to know about hairstyles, and I'm a near expert at getting gum out of hair without making it look as though your head's been attacked by a vaccuum cleaner. I grimaced a little at the sight of Patty's hair. "I can fix that up for you later," I told him. Then I turned to the others. "But for now, we've got a little boy and his hair to save."**_

_**We arrived at the house in record time and slipped down through the chimney. Someone hit the lightswitch and my eyes darted around. Sonya was standing there with her finger on the switch.**_

"_**Sonya," Nigel hissed. "Are you trying to let the whole neighborhood know we're here?"**_

"_**Sorry," she winced. "I'm afraid of the dark."**_

_**The green yo-yo Lee always held shot out and flicked the switch. Wow, he was really good at that. After a little more snooping (and the discovery that Mr. Boss was in the living room, sleeping) we crept up the stairs. I was pretty good at sneaking. I did it all the time at home. When a stair creaked, we all tensed. I waited a few moments, but no sound came. "S'alright," I whispered. We moved forward once Lee gave the signal. Nigel opened the first door. "Must be the older sister's room," he said, closing it after one look. "She's got more Rainbow Monkeys than Numbah 3."**_

"_**I didn't think that was possible," I mumbled. **_

"_**Which one is his?"**_

"_**I'm guessing it's the one on the end marked "Shawnee's room." I told them. We slipped quietly into the room. After a bit of persisting, Shawnee agreed to come with us. Just then Mr. Boss came into the room. Everyone started yelling. I took the opportunity to slip out. Something about this house seemed all-too-familiar….**_

_**I opened the door to the sister's room again. I peered inside. This was…Fanny's room? But why would she..**_

_**I made the connection all-too-fast. So fast I stumbled against the dresser. A mirror banged to the ground. Fanny woke up.**_

"_**Who's that?" she said, shooting up. "Oh, it's you Heather." She relaxed a little. "What in the world are you doing in my house?"**_

"_**Apparently," I said, "rescuing your little brother." I gave her the "we've been played" look, even though it wasn't so much a trick as an honest misunderstanding, and we marched down to Shawnee's room. But before Fanny could reach the door it was flung open and next thing we knew, we were on the ground. We sprung up, unhurt. I jumped over the rail of the stairs and landed perfectly on my feet. Fanny did the same. We raced around for about fifteen minutes, then everything came to a crash in the dark. I was first up.**_

"_**What just happened?" Nigel moaned.**_

"_**Allow me to shine a little light on the situation," I said, flicking the switch. Crumpled on the floor were Nigel, Sonya, Lee, Shawnee, Fanny, Mr. Boss, and a chair, all in a heap.**_

"_**Ok, WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?" Fanny screeched.**_

_**Then she looked over the pile again. "Daddy," she said with a nervous-but-warning tone in her voice. "What did you try to do?"**_

"_**Daddy!" Nigel cried. "Mr. Boss is your dad?"**_

"_**Oh, keep up," I said, lightly smacking Nigel on the back of the head.**_

"_**OF COURSE HE'S MY DAD! THIS IS MY HOUSE!"**_

_**There were a lot of explanations to follow, some tears, and some hugs. "OK, how about some pancakes?" Mr. Boss said. Fanny smiled. Shawnee went after her, and I followed.**_

"_**Hey, do you kids want some pancakes?" Mr. Boss called to the three others, still standing in the middle of the living room.**_

_**They all started agreeing.**_

"_**Well then, GO TO A DINER!" he said, and stalked back to the kitchen.**_

"_**Come on," I said. "I bet I can coax him into giving you a few." They had to admit, I could charm my way into almost anything. We smiled and I turned off the light as I left, forgetting for a moment that Sonya was behind me. "Yeeep!" she squealed.**_

"_**Sorry."**_

_**I AM NOW TAKING REQUESTS OF EPISODES TO DO!**_


	5. CABLETV

**(Sorry for not doing the requests until next chapter, I already had this written when I got them).**

"Singing and dancing isn't really what the Kids Next Door do."

I stepped out from where I was watching in the wings. This TV show wasn't going as well as I'd hoped. Once that guy (who INSISTED he wasn't a baby) was told I wasn't in the KND, he kicked me out of the show. But whatever can be kicked out can be kicked back in.

"Excuse me," I said, coming up to them. I held back a giggle over the fact that Wally looked tall compared to Mr. B. "But can I make a request?"

"A request?" he asked, turning towards me.

"Yes. I would like to request I be the director of this show.""The director?"

"Oh you know what a director is. Just someone to handle all the creative aspects of the show. I mean, you seem so busy."

"Well, maybe I am. But I would have control of what you did, and approve all final decisions."

"Of course."

"I'm still not sure."

"I'll do it for free!"

"You're hired. Remember, I have control over all decisions." I could easily tell what he was thinking. _I'll humor her for a little while, and then I'll carry out my plan. _He turned around and left with his "associates" trailing behind him. I stared at the cast, then the crew.

"Alright!" I said, clapping my hands together and taking a megaphone from a table. "I NEED NEW SET OPTIONS, NEW LIGHTING OPTIONS, NEW SOUND OPTIONS!" I pulled in the rack of clothes that I had taken from the floor in the dressing rooms. They were their normal clothes, each hidden by a garment bag. "And this is the new wardrobe."

"There better not be any cruddy capes," Wally grumbled as he grabbed his numbered bag. I stepped into the girls' dressing room. "Alright," I said to a few random crew members standing around. "Makeup! I need something good but subtle!" I ordered the people in the boys' dressing room to do the same. I went out to the set."Someone get me a craft-services table!" I shouted.

"What will be on it, ma'am?" a crew member asked.

"Candies, donuts, cookies, an ice-cream freezer, and soda," I listed off. "Oh, and chilidogs for Hoagie." She rushed away.

In a few moments the cast was ready, looking very surprised that they were back in their own clothes. The boys were looking even more surprised that they were wearing makeup.

"WHY ARE WE WEARING CRUDDY MAKEUP?" Wally screeched.

"You need some so the lights don't drown out your face. All actors wear makeup," I told him.

"ALRIGHT, LIGHTS!" I shouted through my megaphone. The lights turned on, bright. The stage had been dismantled and everything looked more or less normal.

"ACTORS IN THEIR PLACES?" I cried out. Everyone was there except Hoagie. I glanced towards the craft-services table. There he was, shoving a chilidog in his mouth.

"Hoagie dear," I said, walking up to him. "You can eat after the shoot." He nodded and wiped off his mouth, then headed back to where the stage used to be.

"CAMERAS READY?" I called out. The camera guy nodded.

"IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO….." I pointed. The camera guy started rolling. No one did anything. Hoagie glanced at the craft-services table.

"CUT!" The camera guy stopped rolling. The team looked at me with a confused expression.

"Hey guys," I said, getting out of my director's chair again. "When the camera starts rolling, you're supposed to do something.""You didn't say the one," Nigel pointed out.

"You're not supposed to say the one. That's when the camera starts."

"Ok."

I went back to my director's chair and sat down. "IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO…"

A month later, we were looking at the show's website. I was showing the team some of the comments.

"Abby is definitely my favorite. Where did she get that hat?" I read.

"Aaaaww!"

"Dear KND. I am a big fan of the show. Is Wally in love with Kuki?"

I giggled, and so did everyone but Wally. Lucky for him, Kuki hadn't been listening.

Suddenly a box popped up on my screen. I clicked it. Mr. B.'s angry face popped up on the screen.

"WHAT! ON! EARTH! DO! YOU! THINK! YOU'RE! DOING!" he shouted. "I SAID I WILL APPROVE OF ALL DECISIONS!""Yes, but the director has final say on all creative decisions," I said simply.

"BUT-"

"You know, we've had it with this thang," Abby said. "Goodbye, baby.""I AM NOT A BA-" I hit the mute button. We laughed as he continued yelling at us, but in silence.

**Coming up soon on If I was there**

Operation I.T.

Operation U.N.C.O.O.L.

Operation G.I.R.L.F.R.I.E.N.D.

Operation F.U.G.I.T.I.V.E.

**(Sorry for not doing the requests until next chapter, I already had this written when I got them).**


	6. IT

**No I haven't abandoned my other fics I just have writer's block but I almost have another chapter done for the sister switch so it will be up soon!**

I ran, my heart pounding almost as loud as my feet.

For some reason, everyone always forgot that I wasn't ACTUALLY in the KND.

So that didn't stop him from chasing after me.

I ducked into an alley and caught my breath. I thought for a moment I was safe. So much for thought.

He sprang onto me. He slapped my back.

"Tag, you're it."

He ran off, laughing. Leaving me as the girl who could be the supreme leader of the KND.

Now I didn't really want to. I mean, it sounded great and all, but if they had to start a game of tag to decide who would do it, it must not be as fun as it sounded. Besides, I would have to spend soo much time on the moon. I liked Earth. It had some of my favorite things. Like cookies. And oxygen.

I ran out of the alley, trying to find someone, anyone, to tag. Problem was, I wasn't the fastest runner.

I peeked around a corner. There was Abby in a tree. I was so desperate, I was even willing to tag my soul sister.

For a moment, though, my mind conflicted me. I fought with myself over it for a moment, knowing how SHE would REALLY not want to be leader.

Then I saw a kid with the number 44 on his helmet running towards me. The 44 twins must have split up. I tagged him as he ran past me. I ran the other way, trying to hide. As my watch beeped eleven o'clock, I heard Abby cry out. I felt kind of bad, but there was no time.

I couldn't believe Hoagie's stupidity. There in the stadium was Father. Our-blech-new supreme leader.

When he explained how he became leader, I had to smack Hoagie in the back of the head. Stupidity must run in the family. I sat back in my chair and crossed my arms. A flicker of hope lighted in me when Fanny tried to decommission him (I swear, "immediate decommissionin' " are her two favorite words, next to "stupid boy") but it died when he made the new rule. We went back to the treehouse. I flopped down on the couch.

"Why were YOU it for a moment, Heather?" Kuki asked. She could be happy during almost anything.

"People seem to keep forgetting that I'm not actually an operative," I said.

Just then the treehouse shook. A large green sprout of broccolli suddenly burst through the wall. Then another, then another. The others around me crumbled from weakness. I was the only one who stood my ground. I didn't really like broccolli, but I could at least be near it (and eat it) without passing out.

"This has Father written aaaall over it." I said. I looked at my friends around me, now unconscious. I laid them gently on the couch and chairs, then took a breath and ate my way out. Someone get out the fondon't. I dropped from the treehouse, landing a bit hard on my feet. I had to get to the moon base.

When I got there, I didn't have time to think much before Nigel and Rachel ran past me, screaming. They were being chased by five Fathers. Clones, I figured. I blasted at them with the weapon I kept on my belt. They dissipated into thin air. I caught up with Rachel and Nigel."Catch me up!"

"Father's trying to fill all the treehouses with broccolli!" Rachel said breathlessly.

"Well he already got ours!" I said. We kept running."We have to find the real Father! We're in the middle of a game of tag again and he's it!"

We ran, fighting off various Father clones. We came to a door and stopped to catch our breath.

"We'll never find him before noon at this rate!" I said, panting.

"Here, take this," said five voices in unison. I looked up only to stare into the faces of the Delightful Dorks. "It will help you find the real Father."

I don't need to tell you what happened next. Well, maybe I do. Anyway, long story short, we found the real Father behind a wall of broccolli. Rachel wanted to eat through, but I said I would instead. I had to nearly force-feed some broccolli to Father to get him to turn the thingy off and tag Rachel, who had crawled through the hole I had made. We cleared up after we did, and Nigel and Rachel had a romantic moment (I pretended not to be listening) and he convinced her to be leader again. And everything turned out all happy happy. As I watched Rachel take the reins again, I smiled.

**Coming up on If I was there**

**Operation U.N.C.O.O.L.**

**Operation G.I.R.L.F.R.I.E.N.D.**

**Operation F.U.G.I.T.I.V.E.**

**Operation Q.U.I.E.T.**

**Operation T.H.E.-F.L.Y.**

**Operation F.O.U.N.T.A.I.N.**


	7. FUGITIVE

**Inspiration comes as it does, and I was on a serious block about most requests. But I got this one done, so I thought, "Hey, why not put it up now."**

"Oh yea! Let's just forget about this whole mission and hang out on the beach!" the Brit cried out, sarcasm dripping from every word he said. I shook my head and chuckled, leaning against the ship. Who could blame the team for wanting a day at the beach instead of a rescue mission? Abby was sprawled out on her beach chair, soaking up the sun. Hoagie and Wally were splashing in the shallows. Kuki had already gotten a pretty good start on a sandcastle. And Nigel was furious. However, he didn't notice the steaming redhead behind him. I chuckled again. Fanny being mad, as usual. Of course, at that time, we didn't know each other nearly as well. We kind of did, but we weren't nearly as close as we would soon become.

"And then let's go for pizza and funnel cake! Oh yea!" Nigel screeched. He was about to continue, but Fanny had heard enough. "Funnel cake?" she cried out.

"Num-Numbah 86!" Nigel stammered.

After a lot of yelling, we went over to the crashed ship. The boy and girl who had been driving it had started to wake up.

"Are you alright?" Fanny asked, going over to the brunette girl.

"Yea, we're fine, but-" the boy started to answer, but Fanny cut him off in a rage.

"I DIDN'T ASK YOU! IT'S PROBABLY YOUR FAULT THAT-"

"Guys! Enough!" I said, breaking my silence.

"Well at least she's in a good mood," Hoagie mumbled to his friend. "Usually she's hit us by now."

Fanny went over and yelled at them. Hoagie fumbled over his words and started nervously biting his nails.

"Stop that!" Fanny cried. "Nail bitin' is sooooo disgusting!" She drew out her words like they were covered in poison, and coming from her they might as well be. Suddenly the crashed ship took off, fugitive inside. Fanny screamed at us again and soon we were flying. She was complaining the whole way. "CAN'T THIS PLANE FLY ANY FASTER?"

"CALM DOWN WOULD YA?" I screamed back. Fanny looked half-shocked, half-impressed that I could out-scream her.

This kind of thing happened all throughout the chase. Wally tried to lock on the ship so he could fire at it. "JUST FIRE ALREADY!" the Irish girl screamed.

"We're not locked yet!" the Aussie replied.

"Just do this!" she said, slamming down the button. We heard a boom, but the ship was still in front of us. And now a piece was flying towards our ship.

"Shouldn'ta done that," Abby and I said together.

There was a crash and next thing I knew, the ship was flying away and I was parachuting down.

"OF ALL THE STUPID HISTORY OF STUPID STUPID PEOPLE BEING STUPID, YOU HAVE TO BE THE STUPIDLIEST!""THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD!" I screamed from where I was a few feet above her. We landed with a thump. Fanny insisted that the girls go ahead while the boys guarded a dandelion. Wally appeared to take this job VERY seriously. We creaked open the doors of the Delightfully Stupid Mansion and stepped inside. We split up.

I was roaming the halls for awhile before I spotted a scene. The fugitive had his back to the wall, very confused. Fanny was pointing a weapon at the Delightfuls, who were in bathrobes (no surprise, their bathrobes were a uniform too. Is there anything they DON'T do in sync?) Bruce, the front most blonde boy, had his hands behind his back.

"I SAID, HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM!" Fanny shouted. The Delightfuls brought out their hands. Bruce was holding a jar of something white that I couldn't make out from where I was.

"What-what is that?" Fanny stammered, looking a little wary of the jar.

"It's….toenails," the Delightfuls said in their forever monotonous voice.

"T-t-t-t-t- TOENAILS?" Fanny screeched. I had had enough of this. I slid forwards into their view. "Alright, enough already. Can we just get out of here?" I said. No one seemed to be listening though. The Delightfuls were looking at each other with a sinister gleam in their eyes. Fanny seemed too freaked out about the toenail jar.

"Guys! Guys!" I said. I sighed and elbowed the Delightfuls. They were so startled that the jar in Bruce's hands flew up into the air.

"Few steps to your right," I told Fanny, but she didn't seem to hear me. I sighed and pushed her gently to the floor. I slid to the left just as the jar crashed down. The nails inside went everywhere, missing me and Fanny by inches.

The crash seemed to shake her back to her senses. She looked around, then recoiled at the contents of the jar now spread out in front of her.

"I just saved you like five hours of combing those out of your hair," I told her, then quick as a flash I had hopped over to the other side. I looked towards where the fugitive had been, but he was gone.

"Well don't just stand there! Help us pick up our toenail collection!" the Delightfuls said, bending down as much as they could while still staying in a pack. Like synchronized wolves, they always had to move in a pack. It was weird.

"Yea, cuz I'm sure sharing a brain makes that difficult." I said, before pulling Fanny away to find the fugitive and leaving a very dumbfounded five some behind us.

Abby and Kuki walked up to the now toenail-covered hall. They took one look at it before turning to each other.

"Heather."

**Coming up on If I was there**

**Operation U.N.C.O.O.L.**

**Operation G.I.R.L.F.R.I.E.N.D.**

**Operation Q.U.I.E.T.**

**Operation T.H.E.-F.L.Y.**

**Operation F.O.U.N.T.A.I.N.**

**Operation L.O.V.E.**

**And guys I haven't seen I.N.T.E.R.V.E.I.W.S. yet but I will do that one when I see it!**


	8. UNCOOL

_**Well, there I was.**_

_**Tied up and forced to watch a stupid science-fiction show.**_

_**The kind of show that I would normally skip past when I was channel-surfing.**_

_**I glanced up at the clock in my daze. 2:55. Wait a minute. It was Tuesday, wasn't it? And that meant it was a weekday, didn't it? And that meant-**_

_**I glanced at my soul sister on one side of me, turning her head away.**_

_**The team leader on the other side, trying in vain to jerk his hands free.**_

_**I craned my head backwards. The nerds behind me were paying too much attention to the show.**_

_**I jerked my body upwards. The top of my head struck the chin of the one behind me, the one holding the remote. He dropped said remote in pain, right onto the couch.**_

_**Right next to me.**_

_**I jumped on the remote as best I could, striking it with my back. I hit something. The volume grew. There were groans and complaints from the team. I tried again, hitting it differently. In a flash, the channel changed. The nerds looked up in confusion, some of them glaring at the boy who used to hold the remote, some of them looking around to find it.**_

_**I quickly shoved the remote between the couch cushions. Let them try and find THAT.**_

_**The channel stopped changing. A very familiar girl in a red cap popped up at the bottom of the screen, then backflipped her way into a silhouetted position where she looked ready to unleash a volley of karate chops. Music played, and her number, 5, flashed on the screen behind her while this happened. I smiled. Just made it.**_

"_**Why didn't you do that A HALF HOUR AGO?" Wally complained.**_

"_**Sorry, I was in la-la-land for a moment there," I told him.**_

"_**Go there often?" asked one of the nerds behind me, having given up the search. I turned around and looked at him for a moment, then replied,**_

"_**I have a frequent flyer's card. Why?"**_

_**LOL did u like this one? Hey if you wanna c what some of the KND members would look like as babies, check out .com**_

_**Coming up on If I was there**_

_**Operation G.I.R.L.F.R.I.E.N.D.**_

_**Operation Q.U.I.E.T.**_

_**Operation T.H.E.-F.L.Y.**_

_**Operation F.O.U.N.T.A.I.N.**_

_**Operation L.O.V.E.**_


	9. CARAMEL

"Abby!"

I was running through the hallways of this ding-dang treehouse, trying to find my soul sister. She had been missing for hours.

"Abby!"

"Heather?" I heard her reply. Or, I think it was her. Her voice sounded a little different. I kept running. Pretty soon I collided with someone. We fell to the ground. I looked up. The girl I had crashed into had dark skin, ebony hair up in double braids, glasses, a green shirt, and pink pants. And a bag at her waist.

"Heather!"

"Abby?" I said, looking closely at her. Yes, this was Abby alright.

"What in the name of pink peppermint ice cream happened to you?"

"Long story short, Henrich took away all my coolness."

"Ugh." I said, putting it shortly.

Abby sighed. "I've been like this for hours."

"Come on," I said, reassuring her. "You've always been so cool. You've made stuffing your face with candy look cool, you've made being completely unconscious look cool, and," I took a breath, "you can even make being a total nork look cool."

"Really?" she asked.

"Yup," I said. "Although," I continued, ruffling her braided hair, "I would like to see the return of that little red hat."

She smiled at me. I smiled back. "Let's get you back to normal." She placed one of her caramels in my hand. It glowed brightly. And then there she was, looking like she always did. I patted her head, and we headed off to find her team.

So it was over. Heinrich became Henrietta again, and everyone went back to normal.

I saw something glistening in the corner. It was the caramel. Henrietta was no longer trapped in it, but it was still there.

I don't know why I did, but I popped it in my mouth.

I spat it back out right away. It tasted like sweat and dust. What did I expect? Abby had the thing around her neck for five years, just waiting to be shared.

"What are you doing?" I heard Abby come up behind me.

I turned around and smiled. "Nothing." I stood up. "Now let's go get some real candy. Some that doesn't have people's best qualities trapped in it."

**I am surprising, aren't I?**


	10. TRAINING

**I've decided that I'm better at short stories than long ones, so I might drop some of my longer stories.**

**Anyway, this takes place just after Patton got back at the end of the episode.**

"One jacket? That's all?"

I glanced up at Abby, clad in a winter coat, mittens, and snow boots. The rest of the team had winter clothes on too. We were going to visit Tommy at arctic base, because Hoagie absolutely insisted and, well, nothing was going on anyway. All I had as far as winter clothes was a white faux-fur-lined jacket.

"Yes, for the sixteenth time, that's all."

"But won't you get cold?"

"I like it! Now can we shut up about my choice in winter fashion and talk about something else for three seconds!" I said, a little exasperated.

We arrived at the arctic base. But it wasn't until we stepped out of the ship that we saw the destruction. Most everything in the room was destroyed, and large holes pocked the ceiling. I giggled when I saw the scene in the center of the room. Patton was standing in front of three figures, looking dismayed and angry all at once. The boy on his left was wearing one of those hats like you see people in Alaska wear, I have no idea what they're called. He was holding a green yo-yo that was going up and down in his hand. The girl on the right had blonde pigtails and a pink coat. She was batting her eyes and trying to look cute. And in the middle was Tommy.

"Hi Hoagie!" he called out when he notised his brother. We went over to each other. Hoagie and Tommy started talking, Patton went over to Nigel, Kuki asked after the yo-yo boy (and of course Wally followed her. When the heck is she gonna figure out he loves her?), and Abby and I started talking to the girl with the pigtails. Her name was Sonya.

"Well aren't you sweet?" I said, ruffling her hair. Abby smiled and rolled her eyes. I did that to everyone. We talked for awhile before something happened.

There was a loud CRASH-BANG from outside. Everyone jumped a little. A few seconds later, the power clicked off. I hadn't even notised that some machines had been left humming until they stopped.

"Yee-ee-eeeeeep!" Sonya squealed. Two and two put together, she was terrified. I pulled her near me.

"WHAT THE HECK JUST HAPPENED?" I heard Nigel cry out. I didn't actually see him since the room was pitch-black.

"Someone or something just turned off the power," Hoagie said.

"Well thank you captain DUH!" Abby shouted back. There was a muffled smack, and Wally cried out.

"Sorry," Abby said. "Where's Numbah two so Abby can whack him?"

"Hey!" came a protesting cry from the brothers.

"Well, let's figure out what the heck happened!" I said.

Before we could do anything though, the lights surged back on.

"What the…."

They surged off.

"And how did…."

They came on again.

"But…"

Off again.

"OK WILL YOU STOP IT?" I cried out to nobody. The lights stayed off. I heard Sonya whimpering in my arms.

"Ok, one more time?" I asked tentatively.

"They're not going to listen to-"

The lights came back on.

"Well that was incredibly weird."

**I am so random!**

**Coming up on If I was there**

**Operation G.I.R.L.F.R.I.E.N.D.**

**Operation Q.U.I.E.T.**

**Operation T.H.E.-F.L.Y.**

**Operation F.O.U.N.T.A.I.N.**

**Operation L.O.V.E.**


	11. HOTSTUFF

"Why did stuff like this -puff- never happen -puff- in North Dakota?"We were in the middle of a volcano. More specifically, the Sanban House Volcano. Yup, Kuki had set the thermostat up, and now the thing was ready to blow.

We had crashed at the bottom of the staircase.

"Numbah 5's too young to be using antiperspirant," Abby mused to herself. "But she's thinkin' of starting anytime!"

"Yea," Hoagie agreed. "My underwear's so stuck to my butt I'll need a spatula to pry it off."

Abby looked disgusted. "Why do you insist on saying things Numbah 5 can never un-hear?"

"Guys," I said, trying to maintain peace. I took a swig from the water bottle at my hip. Abby took off her hat to fan herself. Suddenly I notised that her head was smoking. Soon bright orange flames overtook her hair, but she didn't seem to notise. She DID notise when I splashed the entire contents of my water bottle on her head. The fire went out, and so did her temper.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

"Your head was on fire," I said.

Abby looked up and patted her singed hair. "Oh," she said, and placed her hat back onto her head.

"Yeah, oh," I told her, and we pushed on.


	12. GHOST

"I'm gonna get you! You little furry-"

_Squee! A hamster jumped into my arms as I came down from the treehouse._

"_AGH!" Wally cried in frustration._

"_He's just jealous because you can find your way out of a maze and he can't," I told the hamster, then laughed and set him down._

"_So what's the commo' with you?" I asked Wally._

"_Those furry little demons stole my soda again!"_

"_That's all?" I laughed. "You overreact way too much."_

"_I DO NOT!" Wally screamed indignantly._

_I put a hand on his shoulder. "Whatever tickles your peach."_

"_WHAT THE CRUD?" he screamed. "WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?"_

_I sighed and shook my head._


	13. GRADUATES

**OK, this is if I WASN'T there for op. SLUMBER, cuz if I was, well, we wouldn't have an episode, would we? But me and Fanny are still BFFs. (dang, it took me twelve tries to get that right. I hate typing in the dark.) Anyway, STORYTIME!**

"**Unfortunately our code module is missing because a certain operative was having a SLUMBER PARTY instead of guarding it, so…."**

**Fanny looked embarrassed. I crossed my arms and idly started humming "Nobody's Perfect". Sheesh, how long was she going to go on about that? And where the heck were Abby and the others? They should've gotten the code module by now.**

**Suddenly they burst in, tossed the code module to Rachel, and everything started up again. I smiled.**

"**Why the heck does this kind of stuff NEVER happen in North Dakota?" I said, looking annoyed, then changing to a smile. "It's so much fun!"**

"**Shush!" Nigel scolded. I rolled my eyes gently. We crept around a door and came upon Father. We activated our birthday suits, but Father shook his head and said he wasn't going to turn us into adults.**

"**Well if this thing doesn't turn kids into adults…" Abby started, pointing at the machine, now emitting a yellow glow that was spreading, "then what the heck does it-" She stopped when she saw her hand change to a hoof. A few seconds later, she was a gazelle. Funny, I always thought that if she ever turned into an animal, she would be a cat or something.**

"**What the heck?" **

**I watched as the team were turned into animals one by one. Wally became a koala, Kuki a "horrible-adorable" crane, Hoagie a hippo (how very fitting) and Nigel a seal. The yellow glow reached me, and I braced myself.**

**But nothing happened.**

**I smiled. I knew this thing's secret. It only transformed KND operatives.**

"**What? Why didn't it work?" Father screamed.**

"**I'm not in the KND, dummy," I told him. "Not technically."**

"**WHAT?" Father screamed, going into a fiery rage.**

"**Dude, you're burning the ceiling," I pointed out.**

**He looked up. The ceiling was indeed burning through. He sighed and withdrew his flames.**

"**Then I'll just have to capture you MYSELF!" he screamed.**

"**Don't even think about it," I said, and zipped out the door. He chased after me. I thought I saw Tommy ahead of me, which was weird. I ran from Father and finally emerged from the mansion. The yard looked like a war zone. Tiny robots were scattered everywhere, there were a few random animals running around, and in the middle of everything, a bright orange dog yapping her head off.**

"**Fanny?" I said, looking at the dog tentatively.**

**She barked and nodded her head.**

"**OK now this is just wrong."**

**So, Tommy ended up saving everybody. I sighed disappointedly when Rachel said he couldn't come back to the KND. But Tommy said he worked alone now, and was The Tommy. He had donned a black hat and cape. He blasted off towards Earth. Abby watched him go.**

"**I work alone. I am The Tommy!" She laughed and turned to Hoagie. "He is definitely your brother." **

**We all laughed, except for Hoagie. I leaned back against the window. This world was so weird…and I chose to live there.**


End file.
